I need some space, so I can read, write think, and sleep for more than five hours a night! I fantasize about checking into a five star hotel and doing exactly that! I love my family and my friends but sometimes I just need to get away and let my creative ideas flow. I’ve always liked having my late nights.

When everyone else sleeps I’m at my best in the midnight hour. I weave stories, ideas, and thoughts into conduits from my past to tell my tales. Then the darkness starts to turn to light and I head to my bed only to sleep for moments. Then the glaring light of reality rears its ugly head and I have to get out of bed and start my day. My kids need to wake up, get fed, and go to school that’s my life as a parent. Which I do with all my love and honour as their Mom.

Now I must put my dreams away up high on the shelf. I need space to let the ideas turn into my reality. The thoughts filling my head space need to clear so I can continue working on my book draft. I have so many goals and aspirations for myself. I want to feel personal success whether that’s writing a prize winning novel, Nobel peace prize for neurology research, or keeping up with my laundry.

I want the space to think clearly, save money, and travel to places I’ve only read about in my books. I want to stand at the Eiffel Tower looking out onto to Paris and see how the lights of the city glow. I want to run through the fields of green in Ireland and stand above the Cliffs of Moher in County Clare, Ireland as the oceans waves pound against the coastline.


The Eiffel Tower as seen from the Champ de Mars.


Looking North towards O’Brien’s Tower.


Looking South towards Loophead.


Lighthouse at Loophead operated by the Commissioner of Irish Lights.

Ireland photos taken by Bjørn Christian Tørrissen and Eiffel Tower photo by Benh LIEU SONG. These were found on and used in compliance to Creative Commons Attribution laws of copyright.

Where does my time, space, and dreams begin and my goals end? Where does my path occur and how does it fit in with the loom of time? If those threads were cut and my fate changed would I choose a different path? No I don’t believe I would, I have always wanted to be a Mom.

I have let Motherhood envelop my life with the greatest love I’ve ever known. With this love my heart grew three times it size. The love I feel for my children inspires me daily. The gratitude I feel for my husband for the love he gives me, and the space to write out my dreams, and catch up on the sleep I miss is abundant. And the one thing about hotels I can always check in to find my centre, gain balance, and relax. Then it’s time to check out feeling refreshed and ready to take on the world.

This has been my submission to Ash’s Sunday Confession at
Please check out her confession and all the other talent who link up. Thank you for being here today. ?

Jeanine Lebsack

Writer, research assistant, podcaster, reiki healer, and a passionate advocate for neurodiversity. On my writing journey I’ve discovered a plethora of passions including writing, researching, entertaining through song and dance, with a desire to explore and create something transformational and healing. I believe in the sacred art of storytelling and that there’s power in the written and spoken word. Join me on my journey using the magic of words, music, and heart song. I believe we create ripples of energy that flow throughout the universe and by sharing our stories it creates change, positivity, and healing. Have a listen to my podcast on Spotify and Anchor at House of a Writer.

6 thoughts on “Space

  • 19 January 2015 at 6:04 am

    I have to say you’re a lovely writer. It’s also commendable that you’re trying to balance your dreams and motherhood. I hope you reach all your goals, no matter how long it takes.

    • 19 January 2015 at 6:09 am

      Oh my what a lovely compliment! That’s just I needed to read before bed time. Thank you so much for kindness. ?

  • 20 January 2015 at 12:29 am

    Sometimes I forget that there is “life” with all its callings and obligations that have to be taken care of so I can then do what I love to do also, write. If I get caught up in writing, I get so angry that “life” comes calling and interfering with my writing. So hard to balance, especially when you have to stop when the ideas and words are flowing. Sigh <3

    • 20 January 2015 at 1:22 am

      Yes Lassie this is my life with little ones and life comes crashing in. I enjoy my quiet time at night after everyone’s sleeping. But to have uninterrupted time to write would be divine. ?

  • 23 January 2015 at 8:35 pm

    I love this phrase: ‘Where does my path occur and how does it fit in with the loom of time?’ and I love that time at night when everyone is asleep and you have that space to dream.

    • 23 January 2015 at 8:49 pm

      Thank you Andrea, it’s the one place and time that I hold scared. My best thoughts happen at that time. ?


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