The Protective parent
Yesterday was my Captains birthday I remember the day he came into the world. It was a cold and snowy day when I went into labor. And I couldn’t get my coat done up over my belly. My husband ran into the house to grab my bag for the hospital. I was there alone, leaning against our truck crying, contracting, and scared. Then 11 hours later my beautiful baby boy entered my life. My life and heart grew in ways I have never imagined. As I looked into my precious boys eyes I knew this was the defining moment of my life. I knew I’d move heaven and earth to protect him from anything that would harm him. It’s my joy and privilege to be his Mom. The sad part is I can’t protect him from everything. I have to let him experience life and unfortunately he’s been hurt. I’ve felt my heart break into a thousand pieces as I’ve held him in my arms while he’s sobbed “why me?” He’s a kind, caring, compassionate, boy and he doesn’t understand why some people aren’t treating him well. I met with the school administration today and they had glowing remarks to say about my son. He’s polite, respectful, kind, helpful, and caring towards his class mates and school staff. So my question was so he’s getting bullied because he’s essentially a good kid? I reminded them it was in fact bullying as there has been two kids consistently bothering him. Hitting, teasing, premeditated behaviour, these occurrences have reached their criteria for a bullying definition. I found out today as we were on our way to school, that my Captain doesn’t even play with the friends he’s made at school. He said there’s lots of people around them and some of these kids have caused him grief. So he said I’ve found a place where I can watch them play. Somewhere where he can observe and still be safe. First I was so sad to hear this, then I grew to be very mad. So I shared this with the admin staff and they put that into their notes. They laid out of a plan of action to help him cope with his anxiety, stress, and to hold these bullies accountable. Apparently these kids have been flagged with problem behaviour a year ago, and now here’s the repercussions of that not handled effectively. So now the school is a melting pot of emotions, vulnerability, and kids without boundaries. I’ve been assured that there are programs to help the Captain and myself included. So these will be implemented this week. I’ll be meeting with my sons teacher and attending a meeting about protecting students and helpful ways to cope with anxiety and self regulation tips. I’m well versed in this subject as its my daily spoken language in my home. So I left the meeting today filled with hope and promise for the first time, since I walked through those doors. Now I need to convince my son that he’s going to be ok, open his heart and mind to new possibilities to help and to heal his changed heart. And reassure him I’ll always be his proactive, protective parent who loves him to the depths of my heart. I will fulfill that promise since the day I held him in my arms and he blessed me by becoming his Mom. ❤️
26 thoughts on “The Protective parent”
Thank you Mira, I cried a lot while writing this. It was very cathartic though, and good for my soul. ?
May God give u loads of strength.
Thank you I pray daily. I’m sure God says ” oh its that Mom again.” ?
You are an amazing woman:)
Oh thats such a beautiful thing to say!!! Thank you I’m appreciative and humbled. ❤️
What a beautiful post. You are both lucky to have each other! I hope everything improves at school for him; he doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment. No one should have to go through that while just trying to go to school. Oh, and by the way, I love the quote pictured in your post as well — lovely! I have to remember that! 🙂
Thank you so much I feel so blessed to be his Mom!!! I seen the quote and it resonated right down to the core of my soul. I truly believe this will help both my son and I to bond more and heal our hearts in the process. ?
I can relate to your heavy heart over this issue. I’ve been there and had to also take on a few of the teachers and principle at a school. This problem is not going to go away, sadly. But, perhaps a need for addressing why these young people are becoming bullies in the first place. I too as a child suffered being tortured by a bully in grade school. This was back in the 60’s and at that time my school had only 1 bully. Times have changed and not for the better. The parents of the bully needs to be involved as well … this is what I did for my own child. Oddly enough the bully and my child became friends, even through High School. Keep the faith and I know you as a warrior Mother will succeed. Take care and my prayers of hope are on your side.
Thank you for your prayers and support. Yes I find it’s such a vicious cycle. And I believe that it all begins and ends at home. I’m constantly in research mode and have found things that will help in favor of my son. I won’t stop and I won’t back down and I’ll continue to be that force in his life. And now I’ve taken it to a whole new level, by shining a big ugly light on the perpatrators. And I will reprimand their behavior when I see it happening. Not just for my child, but for anyone’s who’s voice isn’t heard. ?
Amen to that my dear, I’m a mom and in your corner. High five .. Take care and happy blogging to ya.
Thank you darling, I really appreciate that. I’m returning that high five with a hug. ?
I’m glad that the school are finally getting their rear ends into gear on this. Keep on them and make sure they stand by what they say although I can already sense you’ll do that. You could tell the school to buy and read “He Was Weird” to show them what may happen on account of their in action. Sorry, had to get that one in. I’m rooting for you.
Thanks you Michael, in fact I mentioned your book in my meeting. I will keep on them as my son’s self worth depends on it. Thank you for continuing guidance and support. ?
You are very welcome.
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My boy went through the same thing in middle school. One day, I noticed, he became very withdrawn and something seemed to bother him. I began getting calls from the principal that he was in the office having “crying spells” in class. I was heart broken as a father, felt helpless. We had some meetings with teachers and come to find out, he was getting bullied. With the help of his teachers and a watchful eye, it resolved thankfully.
I’m so glad that the bullying was resolved with your son. There’s nothing worse than going to school and not feeling safe there. I know from my own personal experience. ❤️
Best of luck, Jeanine. I feel your pain – when our kids hurt it’s worse than when we hurt.
Thank you Linda. Yes its been a roller coaster of emotions and we’re finally seeing some light at the end of the tunnel. ??
Thank you. ?
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Thank you so much for reading I appreciate your kindness. ?
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